LONDON EXCHANGE - Highly respected TheSpoof.com is suddenly on the verge of bankruptcy with its low-rated Magazine division leading the otherwise profitable online news outlet straight down the tubes.
TheSpoof.com editor Mark Lowton has been making feeble attempts to prop up the failing magazine section by taking some of the best news articles submitted by writers and moving them to the magazine -- better known as the Black Hole of satire.
Unable to relieve the tension of running a top flight news organization, editor Mark Lowton has nearly worn out his pud during recent weeks.
"I've tried everything possible to reduce the number of hits our writers get. I tried sitting on stories until the news they try to satirize is long-stale. I tried slowing down The Spoof's news page updates to a crawl. Now I'm moving the best news stories over to our Magazine Section so Google cannot index them."
In a final act of desperation, Mr. Lowton is refusing to answer messages sent in by loyal TheSpoof.com writers. Most financial analysts are recommending that institutional investors dump their Spoof holdings.
Today in late trading, SPOO dropped 45% following yesterday's 28% decline.