English bank tells its customers to F++k off in the written form!

Funny story written by Jaggedone

Wednesday, 19 October 2011


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British banks are warning their customers: "If you want some of this then f++k off!"

A British high street bank, beginning with H and ending with an X (certificate) has adopted a brand new customer policy for those wishing to apply for credits.

They are writing to their customers and telling them to "f++k off" because they have no money to lend due to the financial crisis, impending recession and credit crunch.

One customer in Lancaster called Steve S received a refusal letter with the new policy written in black and white and he didn't even apply for a credit!

A spokesman for the H & X gave the following statement: "Sure, we are telling customers to fuck off if they coming begging for money in these difficult times, it maybe harsh, but money is tight and so are we!"

Several other British banks have also adopted a no go policy using similar messages on their refusal letters, here some examples:

Bollocks off! P+ss off pratt (pretty harmless, Ll++ds are using this one, they're posh), Stupid C++t, don't even bother! Sod off you Wanker! Tosser, no chance! No way you begging bas++rd! etc, etc.

When times are hard, hard up punters really know who their friends are and who to turn to; certainly not the banks!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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