Moammar Gadhafi, former ruler of Libya, has emerged from hiding after his overthrow and has been appointed President of International Banking for Citibank's Middle Eastern Division.
Chuck Ferkemall, Senior Senior President EMEA for Citibank explained. "Hi y'all. Citibank is mighty pleased to announce that Moammar Gahdhafi has joined our company and will spearhead our Mid-East operations. He brings a wealth of experience and a shitload of bullion to the bank.
Moammar is the epitome of the modern banker. He's known for his knock 'em down approach. He's never let the truth get in the way of getting things done. He executes cleanly and just kills the competition, and he loves to gamble with other people's money. And he's not afraid to walk away with more than his fair share without a second thought.
Moammar also brings with him an extensive network of wealthy, if sociopathic, business and other leaders and will be a real good asset for the bank."