
EagleCam Temporarily Shut Down After Teen Eagle Seen Masturbating
Minneapolis, MN: The Minnesota Department of Natural Resources' "DNR EagleCam Live Stream" was temporarily shut down last night after the video stream showed a male teenage Bald Eagle masturbating. The DNR has been inundated with telephone calls and...
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Donald Trump Requests Pardon From President Hillary Clinton
Actually, Trump was begging. In a strange turn of events, as dramatic as the full 32 fouettes from Swan Lake, (the guy can be nimble) Donald Trump asked for a pardon from President Hillary Clinton. Investigators, using forensic software and wor...
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Pay and display on M60
A pay and display scheme is to be introduced on the M60, a spokesman said today. "If people are going to spend hours and hours sitting in their stationary cars on prime Manc real estate, it seems obvious to me that they should pay for it." Said 'H...
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President Trump Believed U.S. Was Launching Senator Ted Cruz Into Syria
Washington, D.C. - According to leaked information from an anonymous source inside the White House, President Donald Trump approved yesterday's Tomahawk cruise missile strike against a Syrian airfield because Trump thought the U.S. would be launching...
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Ode to the Rich and Famous!
Written under my bridge somewhere in Amsterdam: My buttocks have no skin left, my feet dangle in the passing, pristine, ice cold waters of Amsterdam's polluted canals attempting to stop a rusty, discarded bike, thrown over a railing by a discarded junkie. My flea bitten mongrel just shat on my blanket made up of De Algemeen Dagblad, slightly yellow, and now my sore arse will have to be cleaned...
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