Franken Florida
A once picturesque state inhabited by retirees, drug smugglers, and Disney has since been turned into a ghoulish green wasteland of toxic algae. One local resident, Billy Buckle, describes the smell as, "if Satan farted and that fart baked in hell fo...
Read full storyTrump wants to protect Articles 8 through 12, even though they don't exist
Washington, D.C. - Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump vows to protect all 12 Articles of the Constitution, should he be elected president. Although this news was welcome music to many Americans, most of those Americans appear to be une...
Read full storyHillary Clinton and I really went on a booze bender for a couple of days!
I was driving down Route 94 through Detroit a couple days ago and something that looked like a witch flew out of the shadows and attached itself to my car. "What in the mudder-fried hell?!!!" screamed and thundered through my head. I was scared s...
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