Jennifer Aniston Hunts Showers On Planes
Best thing about watching the Australian Open is the Jennifer Aniston commercial. She's cute, neat and doesn't appear to be in need of a shower. In the commercial, she is searching for the shower during a flight. No showers? This isn't an Air Emirate...
Read full storyFernetic speling intradoosed to Orstralya
Yestadee, th Orstralyan Govmint changed al speling over to a simplifide form of fernetic speling. "This moov" sed th Pri Minster, Mr Malcum Turnbul, "wil put Orstralya in th forfront ov wirld progres in edicashun. No moor wil we b slaves too an outda...
Read full story13 Things that Ruin Mankind's Faith in God
There are many things which ruin mankind's faith in God. Here is a selection of the biggest causes, in descending order: 1. Religion. 2. Greasy, fat, corrupt, middle-aged photographers surrounded by beautiful women who do what they tell them no matter how denigrating or violating. 3. Natural disasters such as earthquakes and George Bush Junior. 4. Unnatural disasters such as 9/11 and G...
Read full storyNew York Yankees on the verge of running out of uniform numbers, so they opt for Roman Numerals up to MMMMI
NEW YORK, N.Y. - Primarily because of a rich history in professional baseball and retiring so many jerseys and numbers of its all-time greats, the New York Yankees are running out of uniform numbers. So the team is considering using Roman Numerals...
Read full story"No more immigrants!" says the Prime Minister
In a statement to a group of unbiased human-only media reporters this morning, the Australian Prime Minister, Mr Malcolm Turnbull, announced that, despite UN orders, Australia will not be accepting its usual input of thousands of extra-terrestrial im...
Read full story