
Trump Promises Queen a New Castle if She Will Knight Him
New York, NY In talking about his foreign relations abilities, U.S. Presidential wannabe Donald Trump remarked that he could get along well with other world leaders because they probably all admire him and would want to meet him. "I'm telling Quee...
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Candidates start a new Earth Day competition: being buried alive
New York -- The presidential candidates came face to face with the essence of Earth Day, The five dug their own graves, were covered with soil, and settled down in a contest to see who could last the longest in an embrace wih Mother Earth. "No nee...
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2016 Cinco de Mayo Celebrations Go All Out In Case Of A Trump Ban
Twenty six year old Hunter Young of Boulder Colorado doubts that Donald Trump will be president in 2017, but like many in the US, he's planning to make the 2016 Cinco de Mayo celebration a blow out, just in case. Talking to a TS reporter, Young sa...
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Donald Trump Confuses HPV with HIV
At a news conference Sunday, Donald Trump confused HPV with HIV and insisted there was a vaccine available to prevent HIV. "Now they want to vaccinate kids as young as twelve years old for HIV, and it's like telling them it's OK to go and have sex...
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Before Prince's death, on average, people last thought about singer 7 1/2 years ago: study
HARFOLD, Vt. - As the world mourns the death of singer Prince, who died this week due to complications following an overdose, Harfold State College has released a startling finding. Although most of the Western world has been rendered incapacitate...
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Are You Gay or Straight?
Are You Gay but don't Know it? Maybe you don't shave twice a day, have seven girlfriends for each day of the week and have an interest in meditation?.. well this post is for you. If you are female maybe you have bigger questions in your life outside of ... "What do I do if I get pregnant?" Your REAL identity can be discerned easily. Are you really homosexual and don't know it? So homosexual in...
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Kim Jon-Un Edges Out Putin for Biggest Asshole Leader Award
In an annual poll taken by Jerk Magazine, the dictator of North Korea, Kim Jong-Un, has beaten out three-time winner Vladimir Putin as the leader who was the biggest asshole in 2015. "Although there were many contenders as usual, Kim Jong-Un was the hands-down winner this year, what with his nuclear threats and missile tests and labor camps and Putin actually doing something people like this y...
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