Morning News Shows Feature New Tally: The Weekly Domestic Body Count
AP (Adjacent Press)--In response to the weekly reports of mass shootings across the US, many morning news shows are now including, among their morning segments, a weekly domestic body count of the number of victims lost to gun violence across the cou…
Read full storyMcDonald's Launches New Minimum Wage Menu
McDonaldland, USA -- Bowing to pressure from minimum-wage maximization advocates, the McDonald's Corporation today introduced a "more affordable" menu designed exclusively for workers at the bottom of the pay scale. "We can't afford to raise the s...
Read full storyTories To Solve Ukip problem
Our political correspondent, Joe Whippet, has discovered the Tory answer to Ukip. In a logical extension of the plan to make any strikes illegal, that are not backed by at least 50% of Union members the next step is to make any elections that are...
Read full storyPope in Miracle Search
Pope Francis has set his mind on being a Saint and has started by trying to solve the conflict between the Palestinians and Israel. He told waiting reporters that 'it will be miracle that would put the miracles of my predecessors in the shade'. Ne...
Read full storyUKIP Win Historic Victory In European Elections; 90% of London Restaurants To Close
"The dream has become a reality" "The penny has dropped" "We are now the third force in British politics". Champagne was pouring down the throats of UKIP members last night as a historic victory in the European elections boosted them by 11 M...
Read full storyThe Blame In Ukraine Lies Mainly in The Brain (of Putin)
Russian separatists in Ukraine, eager to show the world just how diplomatic and democratic they are in their newly taken over territory, smashed voting tables, threatened vote takers and surrounded the home of a man vocally in support of elections...
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