McDonalds Follows KFC in using Healthier Frying Methods
Last week, giant chicken chain KFC announced their intentions to begin frying their foods in a healthier oil. Not to be outdone, other fast food restaurants have jumped on the bandwagon. McDonalds, the largest of these, has announced plans to begin...
Read full storySaddam Hussein Chooses Alternate Execution Method, Death by Chocolate
Thanks to leniency by the Iraqi court Saddam Hussein will not only live another day but will also get to choose an alternate method of going to meet Allah. When presented with such creative suggestions as getting eaten by Jackals, sl...
Read full storyElection Results Show Some Surprises
While most election stories will focus on the two major parties gains or losses in Governor, Senate, and House races, this article will focus on some of the other issues being voted on at the polls.
Read full storyMissing Link is jailed for fraud
Pensacola - (Associated Mess): The Missing Link founder of the Creation Science Evangelism and Dinosaur Adventure Land in Pensacola has been sentenced to a maximum of 288 years in the slammer for fraud.
Read full storySanta in $8.3bn deal with DHL
It is reported that jolly old St. Nick has given delivery firm DHL a Christmas present a little early this year. In a deal worth $8.3bn, Santa has approached them to help lighten his load this Christmas by delivering at least 97% of all presents.
Read full storyGeller says famous psychic led US to Saddam spider hole
Tel Aviv - (Associated Mess): In a rare political interview, the reclusive Israeli spoonbender Uri Geller has told the press that the power of the paranormal led American troops to fugitive Saddam Hussein's hidey-hole bunker.
Read full storyGod Issues Apology to Many Dead Sinners
In a statement jointly released by the Vatican, The Southern Baptist Convention, Temple Square in Salt Lake City, and the headquarters of most Christian denominations, God has issued a formal apology to many dead sinners killed due to his wrath in th...
Read full storyMuslim cops ditch Blair amid extremism fears
London - (Associated Mess): Officers claiming compromised professional ethics standards and religious discrimination have asked to be excused guarding Prime Monster Tony Blair because they fear he has links to extremists.
Read full storyAlabama to Allow Voting via Instant Messenger
Election officials are "concerned" after Alabama's Legislature revealed that not only would it's voters be allowed to cast their votes in November via Instant Messenger but Hotmail, Gmail, Fax and even their Motorola Razrs as well i...
Read full storyBlair in "I meant to take you darling" poser
Whitehall, London - (Associated Mess): UK reporters were left baffled at the monthly Downing Street press conference yesterday when Prime Monster Tony Blair apologised for missing out the Daily Fascist's political editor from his briefs with a &q...
Read full storyGeorge Bush Recants and Condemns Death Verdict for Saddam Hussein
WASHINGTON (AP)-- President George Bush has about faced, reversing his enthusiasm for the death verdict handed down by his puppet judge in the Iraqi show trial.
Read full storyBritish Sex Study is a Hoax
LONDON -- The "first comprehensive global study of sexual behaviour" has been determined to be a hoax, say French researchers. The British research found that that married people have the most sex, and there is no firm link between promisc...
Read full storyIraq's Next Top Hangman - Confirmed this Season, Saddam Execution Finale!
Baghdad, Iraq - Aljazeera TV ratings winner Iraq's Next Top Hangman (INTH) is in it's 8th cycle this year with 2006 set to be bigger than ever. Just days after Saddam Hussein was sentenced to hang, Iraqi officials have agreed to hand over the...
Read full storyHubble Space Telescope Revamped under Direction of Bill O'Reilly
Controversial FOX News star Bill O'Reilly has hurled himself into another controversy. His critics are not sure what annoys them more: the fact that he's getting the Hubble telescope revamped or the fact that he's renaming it the "O...
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