A Coloured Outlook
George W. Bush visited the devastation that once was New Orleans, accompanied by Condoleeza Rice, Donald Rumsfeld, an army of aides and security personnel, plus representatives of the Press. It was necessary to reinstate confidence, after appointing a KKK Grand Wizard as head of clean-up operations, and the nation wondering why nothing was happening to help this hurricane ravaged area of the Deep...
Read full storyAl-Zawahiri: "What, Me Worry?"
Ayman Al-Zawahiri, top ranking Al-Qaeda official, released a video message Thursday calling for an end to U.S. occupation in Iraq and the release of his vintage collection of Mad Magazines. According to Al-Zawahiri, failure to respond to the demand...
Read full storyNew Orleans gets Presidential visit.
Nearly two weeks after the Gulf States were devastated by Hurricane Katrina, the President of the United States of America, George W. Bush, finally saw for himself the devastation in his first official visit to New Orleans.
Read full storyPentagon Wants Nuclear Strikes to Increase Britney Spears CD Sales
THE PENTAGON (AP)-- A new draft US defense paper calls for preventive nuclear strikes against any foreign state if its people don't buy enough audio CDs by Britney Spears or some other American musician.
Read full storyBraves to Beetles
Tired of the controversy surrounding the use of Native Americans as their mascot, major stockholders in the company that owns the Braves have voted to change the mascot to a dung beetle.
Read full storyResearch Boosts Republican Brains
Washington (ARF)--Republicans may not be the brightest people on Earth, but provocative new research has managed to increase their brain capacity to its final form.
Read full storyNew Orleans Dogs Begin Looting, Raping Cats
Jefferson Parish -- "Max," left behind on a rooftop, waited for a helicopter that never arrived. "After four days the Alpo ran out, and I had to drink that nasty toilet water along the edge of the roof. Eventually, I realized if I d...
Read full storyPresident Bush Terrified of Black People
New Orleans - Call it a fear, a phobia, but not racism. George W. Bush is simply frightened by black people. In his first visit to New Orleans, he never got closer than five hundred feet to any people of color, despite working side by side with Co...
Read full storyGeorge Bush Lands on Iwo Jima Under Intense Fire
Combat correspondents and photographers were on hand to capture the image of George Bush making the final assault on Iwo Jima. The bloody battle had been raging for several days and bodies were all around Iwo Jima. The fearless President of the Unit...
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