French officials to use pastries to quash riots
PARIS, -- French officials declared an emergency pastry distribution period in an attempt by the government to stop the civil disturbances across the country.
Read full storyHouston And Brown Are One And The Same
Music bosses confirmed that Whitney Houston and James Brown are the same person. For years there has been speculation spinning around Tinsel Town, which was fanned by the fact that the two Soul Diva's have never been seen together. This is provin...
Read full storyBritney Spears Sends Her Little Bundle Of Joy Off To Get A Job!
Hollywood, the Highway Of Broken Dreams---Unhappy, annoyed, dismayed and very ticked off at all the persnickety little demands Pint Sized Sean Spears Crying King Federline has been making at home, Britney Spears has decided to send the little sucker...
Read full storyBush Declares War on Natural Disasters
As the death toll from the earthquake in South Asia reached over 80,000 and with the U.S. Government facing increasing criticism over it's handling of Hurricane Katrina, Bush declared war against natural disasters today.
Read full storyTerrorists Plot Targeting Australian Breweries says Howard
Sydney -- Australian authorities yesterday foiled a terrorist attack against Tooheys, Coopers, Guiness, Fosters, and other major breweries according to PM John Howard. Says Howard, "In the United States, high importance targets would include...
Read full storyRepentant George W. Bush, "Born Again," Admits to Lying about Torture
PANAMA CITY, Panama - "We do not torture," Bush declared in response to reports of secret CIA prisons overseas. Pausing, he adds, "Well, ahh, actually, I guess we do. Or did. You see, I've been born again for real this time,...
Read full storyJar Jar Binks To Replace Roeper; New Show Ebert and Binks
FIrst, it was Siskel and Ebert, then it was Ebert and guest star, then it was Ebert and Roeper, and now it's Ebert and Binks. Naboo native, former Republic Senator, and military hero Jar Jar Binks will replace Richard Roeper on the popular movie...
Read full storyAmateur Video of Panther Cheerleaders Having Stall Sex Surfaces
TAMPEX, Fla. - Two Carolina Panthers cheerleaders arrested after having sex in a restroom stall were caught on video by one of the irritated patrons waiting to pee. The patron, sporting a Nikon Coolpix 5100, recorded approximately 3 minutes of vide...
Read full storyTabloids Sue Britney Spears
In a strange twist, the tabloid magazines (The Globe, The Star, The National Enquirer, and several others) have jointly filed a lawsuit against singer and recent mother Britney Spears. In a press conference announcing the lawsuit, Marvin Stapleton o...
Read full storyKate Hudson Sues Tabloids for Anorexia Accusations
Actress Kate Hudson, daughter of Goldie Hawn, has sued several tabloids due to their all running pictures of the actress that show her as having an eating disorder. The young actress was nominated for an Academy Award for her work in Almost Famous.
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