Full of Bile, Ashcroft To Have Heart Removed -- IF Surgeon Can Find It
WASHINGTON - Doctors attending Attorney General John Ashcroft found a troublesome fact after they ordered surgical removal of the Cabinet officer's heart to prevent a recurrence of bile buildup.
Read full storyBush's Joke About WMD Draws Criticism - Now Read the Original Unedited Script!
A ex-college friend with connections at the NSA sent this in. It might be the actual, original script of Bush's tasteless "comedy" performance at the annual Radio and Television News Correspondents Association dinner. In the video aired for the even...
Read full storyLouisiana Imposes Tax on Public Urination
New Orleans - Do you have the "urge" and little time to spare? You may be out of luck according to Louisiana lawmakers. A new ordinance hit the books Monday that seeks to eliminate all public urination and defecation on public streets.
Read full storyHey Jude - Don't Puff On That Tuft
It has been revealed that the actor Jude Law has starting smoking human hair.
Read full storyGeorge Bush Threatens Saddam: Talk or Spend A Steamy Night With Michael Jackson; Saddam Terrified
Frustrated with the lack of co-operation by Saddam Hussein with the United States, in its ongoing war on terror, George Bush and senior military leaders have threatened to make Saddam Hussein spend a night in the honeymoon suite of Fallujah Hotel wit...
Read full storyJimi Hendrix's Ghost Lives In My Grandad's Hearing Aid
Peter Norton, a cheeky Cockney schoolboy, shocked pop veterans with his news that the ghost of the guitar legend, Jimi Hendrix was haunting his grandad's hearing aid.
Read full storyRonald McDonald busted for bestiality
Aging fast-food spokesman Ronald McDonald was arrested early this morning on his Midland, Texas, farm amidst sensational allegations...
Read full storyColin Powell Wins Nobel Prize for Stand-up Comedy
Oslo--Today's surprise winner of the Nobel Prize for Stand-up Comedy was American Secretary of State Colin Powell. The following is a transcript of the remarks of the committee member making the announcement:...
Read full storyVisitors, Locals Perplexed By Tall, Monolithic "Mystery Building" In Manhattan
(New York, New York) A vast edifice on Manhattan's East Side, occupying an enormous, park-like lot that covers several blocks of what would otherwise be prime Manhattan riverfront real estate, has long mystified visitors and locals alike.
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