In Royal News, The Duke Of Edinburgh has dumbfounded doubters and been awarded the Duke Of Edinburgh Award for services above and beyond the call of duty. The Prince, or Keith as he's known amongst his close circle of friends, is usually best kn...
Prince William is said to be 'furious' after his grandmother, Queen Elizabeth II, allegedly upset his wife-to-be, the commoner Kate Middleton. The row took place in Buckingham Palace late one evening, sources say, and resulted in Miss Middleton st...
The Duke of Edinburgh yesterday arrived at the South Lynn Women's Institute in Norfolk to cheers and a plethora of union jacks, but rather than being on an official visit he was there to learn how to change his behaviour. Following a recent court...
London - (Prenup): The Palace's Lord Chamberlain Lord Luce-Cannon said today HM had accidentally sent them a 'Sorry To hear You Are Leaving' card by mistake at Christmas "although it was festooned with festive robins and holly, heheh!" Apparently...
Bromyard, Herefordshire - (Ass Biz): A play about the legendary sleuth's foragings in royal underwear has been banned to spare HM's blushes. The opening night of The Furtive (sic) Adventures of Sherlock Holmes and the Strange Case of the Queen's K...
Sandringham, Norfolk - (Lèse Majesté): Palace officials have taken the precaution of removing sharp objects, toxins and non-prescription stimulants that have propped up her useless - and largely fictitious - reign. Fears that Queen Elizabeth may t...
Queen Elizabeth is - it appears - a Royal slave driver. Apparently she will NOT be giving staff at the 'Palaces' the day off on William and Kate's Wedding Day. Naturally, they are all pretty upset, which is putting in mildly. No wonder she is hav...
Her Majesty the Queen, has decreed, that royal weddings will now be financed in line with ordinary working class nuptials. This has shocked Palace aides and flunkies who make thousands of pounds out of the royal wedding festivities. Everybody invo...
Royal Handbag Holder and consort Phil the Greek wandered into another controversy. He was told by his handlers that Charlotte Church had claimed that the Queen is "an old woman who has no idea what is going on". Nonagenarian Phil immediately rallied...
Following our news exclusive of yesterday, there has been an outpouring of sympathy for the Queen. Celebrities on both sides of the 'Pond' have flooded the Royal internet site with offers of help. "We can't bear to think of poor HRH homeless!" exc...
Sandringham, Norfolk - (Aneurysms): The imminent solar eclipse is playing havoc with the Queen, who has been diagnosed Whorse de Combat with congenital swine flu. Palace physicians fear her Circle of Wallis arteries at the base of the brain have b...
In a shock announcement, HRH Queen Elizabeth the Second has declared that she will be putting Buckingham Palace on the market this spring, at an asking price as yet undisclosed. This move has come at a time of hardship for the Royals: two wedding...
[INSIDE THE BIRTHING ROOM - BUCKINGHAM PALACE] Phew! That was almost the year that was. After the bad-hat fiasco would there be anything that could put a smile on the Royal Glums? Well thanks to the colonies - C-eh-N-eh-D-eh to be exact, QE2...
The Queen becomes a great-grandmother as Peter Phillips' wife Autumn has a baby daughter Yes, our dear Queen is a great-grandmother and, although delighted, she does say that she is now beginning to 'feel her age' however she assures us she still...
Buckingham Palace, LONDON: What HM Queen Elizabeth II should have said in the Queens speech is: "I'm a fraud. I'm not the Queen of a Sovereign Country any more as I gave our sovereignty away when I signed the final Lisbon Treaty. I'm standing her...
Her Majesty, Elizabeth, The Queen has delivered her annual Christmas message. In it she placed considerable emphasis on the role sport plays in our national psyche. She noted that when Man U play Manchester City rival fans get together to abuse an...
London - (Yule-Be-Sorry!): A new decryption of 2012 Mayan calendar rants has found a chilling Yuletide prophecy about the Queen. Behind the gibberish of apocalyptic scares lies a pre-Columbian Mesoamerica grimoire about the end of the Merovingian...
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