London - Three days of pomp and pageantry got off to a shaky start today at the Turkish presidential state visit opening ceremony. Representing the largely secular NATO ally the country's First Lady Mrs Hayrunnisa Gul stunned Brit officials with h...
London - She's been banished from Tuesday's glittering reception for Turkey President Abdullah Gul due to new bulimia attack fears that Kate Middleton will end up chucking up all over extinguished - er...distinguished! - guests. "The Queen just ca...
Thumbing their beaks at town residents who had complained about their presence in the community, a flock of about 100 wild turkeys added insult to injury last night by throwing themselves a huge Thanksgiving feast in the park at the town center.
Germany's out-of-control Roentgen Satellite (Rosat) - seen re-entering the Earth's atmosphere around 02.00GMT - is suspected of causing the 7.3 tremor which struck Eastern Turkey's city of Van today. Some 20 tonnes of space junk are thought to hav...
Turkey that was supposedly pardoned by president Bush ends up at Guantanamo Bay. I have learned from sources too vague and obscure to be viewed as credible by the main stream media that the turkey that was originally picked to be pardoned by president Bush at the annual White House Thanksgiving day ceremony has instead been the victim of a Homeland Security/CIA secret rendition transfer to Guan...
Somebody shot somebody in Yugoslavia and this caused World War I. This has become known as "The shot heard round the world." People in those days had excellent hearing because they didn't have iPods blaring in their ears. The shot heard round the wor...
People are eating a healthier diet these days and have reduced the use of red meats. However, it also means increasing the use of lean meats such as fish, chicken and turkey. Since the popularity of switching hamburg meat to ground turkey, more and...
Flower, a turkey pardoned by President Bush in November of 2007, is now accused of murdering a family of 5 in upper New York State. The Norton family of Rowling, New York, were enjoying a quiet Sunday afternoon at home when the alleged crime took pla...
Continuing the pioneering work of legendary turkey farmer extraordinaire Bernard Matthews, Irish chicken breeder Patrick O'Feckit has come up with an ingenious scheme which may answer the ever-increasing demand for chicken. For many years he has...
Google's Blogger site has been in Turkey after it was discovered that some games broadcast live on satellite station Digiturk were being reported live in text form on personal blogs. This is by no means the first time the country has been involved...
News from the Alaskan state capita,l Fookinkold, is that Sarah Palin is pregnant and expecting in June. Sarah revealed that she became pregnant after a visit to George Bush's ranch in Texas. With the difference in temperature between the 2 states...
London, England - "Boy is that 25 lb bird still at the butchers shop?" "You mean the one as big as me?" "Yes, bigger than you!.. Wonderful lad, charming fellow. Take these coins and go and buy it this instant, then take a taxi to 2 Porter Stree...
The latest mobile deal is upon us, ready for the Christmas season. Crazy low rates are being offered by one mobile operator which is offering unlimited Turkey calls for just 1p per minute. The seasonal offer from Turkey-Mobile is hoped to raise ov...
Harry Caster, through his attorney C. Brewton Collier revealed today that a family Thanksgiving Dinner was ruined when a "breast implant" was discovered in their turkey. "It was devastating for the family," Collier stated, "You can just imagine, t...
Now that another Thanksgiving has come and gone and the last of the turkey meat is being picked from the carcass, you may be wondering if there is anything you can do with the carcass besides putting it in the trash. And the answer would be a resounding yes! Here are 5 awesome uses for that dried out leftover turkey carcass: 1. Use as a vessel for a birthday piñata. Real piñatas cost an arm...
Lindsay Lohan was forced to spend at least part of her Thanksgiving with father Michael Lohan and former boyfriend Sam Ronson as punishment by the Betty Ford Clinic. That was the joke?? An eating Samantha Ronson joke?? "And the Tofurky was terri...
Bernard Matthews, famous for his turkeys, has made the ultimate sacrifice just in time for Christmas. He should be ready in the shops in time for the great festivities. 'It will give my Christmas that extra oomph' said housewife Vera Mook 'to have...
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