I was sitting on the toilet this morning (I found a dime under the Coke machine) reading the paper and George Bush made me gag. Gagging in the restroom is not recommended, but on the back page of the front section (where I assume it will be overlooked) the Associated Press reported that the President has called for the elimination of all tariffs and subsidies, worldwide, to promote peace and prosp...
Well, maybe you don't need to go to jail to have a happy Thanksgiving, but I was feeling quite Mr. Potterish today, as the GD season of peace and love creeps into my butt.
JERUSALEM - U.S. Secretary of State Condeleeza Rice is being hailed by Israeli and Palestinian leaders as an international hero after securing peace between the two countries.
(Boston) - Terrorist Osama Bin Laden today was awarded the prestigious Harvard Peace Prize for not attacking the United States in the previous year.
Gal Dang Roy! Billy Bob here! Git yer shotgun! I found one o dem real live terrerist fellas on this here YouTube thang. He's spoutin' all that gibberish about Allah and Jihad and Mohammad and stuff. Hell, he's even talkin' about PEACE! He's probly not only a Ilamalist fundamentalism, but a hippy too! He even sed that Mohammud was the greatest prophet, an' we all know that the greatest proph...
Such bitter exchanges are rare between an incumbent US president and one of his predecessors, analysts say but that is exactly what is happening here.
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - London - TheSpoof.com writer CalJennings had no idea that Sir Paul McCartney would take him up on his suggestion to sing for world peace, but that's just what Sir Paul plans to do.
"War is hell." I'm not sure exactly who said that, but I know it to be true. Though I was never actually in combat myself, I did watch "Saving Private Ryan", so I'm a bit of an authority on that subject. Sometimes, though, peace time can be just as brutal.
The Pope has used his customary Easter address to call for world peace. However, as the masses nodded at the speech they've heard so many times, Pope Benedict shocked many when, straight after calling for peace, he called for chocolate.
Argentina - One thousand soccer fans where forced to make friends, and over nine-hundred were smiled at after peace broke out at a local soccer game.
London - (Associated Mess): Fundamentalist religious stink tanks are demanding that the Government caves in to their demands this weekend and replaces the traditional Remembrance Day red poppy with the more politically correct papaver somniferum albu...
Bethlehem, The Holy Land---Hamas, the militant West Bank political sect that swept to power on unkeepable promises and unspeakable acts of unmitigated violence and hostility, has decided it can conduct business as usual without foreign help by printi...
A Cave - Afghanistan...
Dateline: Heaven - God, in an interview with reporters, during a recent book signing at the Gospel superstore "Prayers R-Us", commented on his latest book "War and Fleece". "This text is not warm and fuzzy, as you might have thought from the title...
In a public statement which experts have anticipated for over a week, President Bush revealed that his administration considers the Barbary Pirates to be a grave threat to world peace and American security. "These unprincipled terrorists have no resp...
Today NASA announced its plans to further the cause of world peace.
STOCKHOLM (UPI)-In a massive blow against further warmongering by Republican oil industry puppet US President George W. Bush, Cindy Sheehan has today won the Nobel Peace Prize. Sheehan's vigil outside the President's ranch at Crawford, Texas has...
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