It should come as no surprise to regular readers that cheeky Geordie chappie Joe McElderry won the X-Factor final here Sunday evening. We told you this would happen weeks ago. We have the best insiders in showbiz affairs on the planet, sometimes b...
After tonight's not at all surprise X factor result, Scientists fear that the world is now in supreme crisis. Nasa and Nato have gone to Defcon4 and the Environment Agency have raised the Thames Flood Barrier in preparation for an onslaught of bib...
(Defecated News) Hit TV talent show 'The X-Factor' has given us the image that the judges are respectful of each other beyond all the petty bickering over who's act is shitter than the other's, or whether it's OK to say that one of Simon's acts like...
Kate Moss has won the icon of the decade award. This award was voted for by the readers of the secret online magazine "I'm gonna be skinny, even if it kills me" She won the award despite strong competition from other skinny icons. Both Cheryl...
(Defecated News) Troubled pop queen Cheryl Cole was arrested last week outside South Shields' Lidl Supermarket. The pint-sized diva, known for her pert nipples and inability to sing live had been reported to police by the store. Head of Lidl secu...
(Defecated News) South Shield's very own Vicky Pollard failed to woo her most loyal of fans at a recent concert. The event was held outside the South Shields Shellsuit Society building in front of over a dozen of her fans. "Ah wuxx horpin t'g...
(Defecated News) She's loved by all in the UK. The ladies would love to be like her, and the gentlemen would love to come inside her. But it would appear also, that out little geordie treasure is loved internationally. Following he spectacular eff...
(Defecated News) We love to hate them, but paparazzi give the showbiz world the exposure they deserve. From 'up-skirt shots' of Brittney Spears to killing Princess Diana - they have served the community honourably. However, their recent photos of...
Little known English County Wales is in mourning tonight after warbling pre-pubescent songster Lloyd Daniels was unceremoniously booted off tonight's X Factor. Daniels, 6 months and a barely formed foetus lost out to gurning Essex Love-God Olly Mu...
The big X-Factor story tonight is that a little old New York City gal, Alicia Keys, did what no other headlining act has managed so far - she actually sang live on the X-Factor. Plucky Alicia showed every other celeb mime artist up by actually sin...
LONDON - Noted singer and famed X-Factor judge Cheryl Cole told a reporter for the BBC that she has just been informed that her 2010 calendar, "Cheryl Cole's 12 Titillating Views" has already sold more copies than any other nude calendar in the histo...
X-Factor judge Cheryl Cole has been accused by advertising watchdogs in the UK of falsely promoting the beneficial effects of hair care products. Cheryl, who is universally adored by everybody in the world, with the exception of a certain football...
The TV show X-Factor plumbed new and ever greater depths yesterday as 'guest artiste' Shakira appeared to be miming, following in the Cheryl Cole tradition. We contacted top mime artiste Marcel Marinado, who comes from France, and is French and as...
Internet footage purporting to show X-Factor judge, wife of Olympic quality diver Ashley, chart topping warbler Cheryl Cole and ESPN presenter mit da boobies, Erin Andrews in some hot lesbian action has been exposed as fake. Internet researchers w...
Following widespread condemnation and walk-outs by Aussie audiences during her 'Circus' tour because she was miming and that big-screens malfunctioned, Britney Spears has gone into hiding in tha hope that the clamour will eventually tail off. Spea...
The wife of a famously belligerent celebrity footballer, who also happens to be a talent show judge (height 5'3" hair extensions and talented mime artiste) has informed her bone-headed hubby that she won't put her wedding ring back on until hubby adm...
MANCHESTER, England - X-Factor Judges Cheryl Cole and Dannii Minogue will be co-hosting The 1st Annual Telethon To Benefit Short People. The idea first came to Cole one day when she opened up her kitchen cupboard to get a drinking glass. She said...
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