David Cameron and Nick Clegg have been hailed by the right-leaning broadsheets as leading a truly revolutionary government. This adulation comes hot on the heels of a series of major policy announcements, which have been made over the last few day...
Whitehall are to ban rectangles in government buildings as part of a cost cutting exercise aimed at saving the tax payer millions of pounds a year. Officials plan to implement the proposals within the next fortnight after the National Audit Offic...
The Government has reinforced its pledge to tackle climate change despite sweeping financial cuts since coming into power last May. Speaking at The University of Bridlington, Nick Clegg said : "That it was time that the people of this country saw the...
Giving prisoners detained at Her Majesty's Pleasure the right to vote is set to be introduced by the Coalition Government due to verdicts in the European Courts of Justice. The inmate constituency throughout Britain is around 100,000 people and it...
INorder to publise the addition of Rasputin to the Cabinet, David Cameron has agreed to a request by David Dimbleby to participate in question time in Siberia. The panel will include his good friend Boris Johnson, his not so good friend John Prescott plus special guest Secretary of State Hilary Clinton. Qustion time was held in the picturesque town of Omsk, Dimbleby welcome the media and the l...
In today's world where a sneeze on one side of the world can give someone in another part of the world flu. I am here to report some news that happened less than a few hours ago and boy is it causing shockwaves at Downing street. Michael Heseltine...
The huge increase in Rail Fares which will come in due to the Government's Spending Review has given a boost to the Biking fraternity. 'Get on your Bike' is the cry from the deepest depths of a cavern in the Derbyshire Hills. 'If you can't find a...
A UK government spokesman has admitted that spending cuts aimed to hit everyone under the age of 66 were implemented because they want to shag old people. 'We want to have sex with old people' admitted a government spokesperson. 'This is why we...
Independent observers declared today that the Con-Dem government spending review was the equivalent of political suicide for the coalition government. As analysts revealed that the true purpose of the spending review was to get people off welfare,...
Aging front man for the legendary rock band The Rolling Stones has announced that he will run for a seat in The House of Commons. "I am serious" he told skeptical reporters. "Why, Mick? Why are you doing it" Called out one reporter from the BBC.
The News of the World made a sensational report today with secret cameras revealing Muggers in the City. At a secret location a NOW secret agent with a camera in her lapel filmed a well known City magnate claiming benefits for his children who are...
With the Government completing the spending review the Defence industries are feeling under fire. But a solution to their problems has emerged and our briefings tell us of remarkable last minute UK deals. We learn that Trident is back in favour an...
Well it's not an extinct bird from the rainforests of Madagascar or a fancy drum played by the homeless on street corners. For those of us that care the most simple definition has to be they are black holes for our cash. Yes, for the last 10 years these so called think tanks and department supervisors have been hovering up tax payer's cash like an Essex girl snorts coke on a Friday night, but n...
As the day of reckoning approaches for the Coalition, it is reported that Prison Governors fear that their prisons may be emptied. With October 20th, aka "Big Cut day, vive the Big Society" the blackest day for the ordinary UK citizen since their...
I had this dream about the Tory Conference. George Osborne alienated his core voters and the Daily Mail had apoplexy. Cameron apologised for the gigantic cock up and said sorry for the atrocious mathematics, but it was all because of the mess left by Labour. Boris tried to get the limelight and failed. Warring factions threatened to cause problems. LibDems complained they didn't know about the...
Conservative Chancellor of the Exchequer George Osborne has caused outrage in a speech in which he says that, rather than scrapping Child Benefit, he is to put a proposition to the House of Commons that a 'childbirth limit' is to be set, to prevent p...
"We are all in this together." - So, it is reported, Mr and Mrs Ed Bowls and Ed Multiband and partner are happy to echo. The lucky couples will continue to receive Child Benefit. Even though they are filthy rich and dare it be mentioned, Labour to...
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