That's what happens when you are a somewhat aristo in jolly olde. You get to write a weekly column on absolutely nothing. So it was no surprise when a dreadfully boring columnist for an equally boring publication wrote a dreadfully boring piece on...
Bollywoodtown, Mumbai: This city of 14 million had all the right amount of hot-mirch and sizzle as the 17th Screen Awards ceremony (Mumbai's equivalent of the Oscars) brought some 6-million Scoville unit garam-masala heat to an otherwise chilly nigh...
And to think he could almost have become POTUS [President of the United States]. According to information gleaned from a 'highly-respectable' (sic) news source, former Presidential candidate and world's number one dirty rat fink John Edwards has app...
Teen heart-throb - he of the full head of hair has been uncovered. Turns out that the great big pudding bowl of hair on his head is - horrors - actually a wig! And better yet, it's made out of his own hair! Seems Justin started losing his hair w...
There's more to the untalented, totally re-constructed, empty-minded Kardashian sisters. Because just when you thought you knew everything you needed to know about them and their daily habits - along comes a startling bit of Kardashian trivia. Th...
Royal Handbag Holder and consort Phil the Greek wandered into another controversy. He was told by his handlers that Charlotte Church had claimed that the Queen is "an old woman who has no idea what is going on". Nonagenarian Phil immediately rallied...
She's well-known for making her New Year's psych[ot]ic predictions. After which she hibernates for 6 weeks then is woken up by her followers. If they see her shadow another prediction is revealed with winter continuing for another 6 weeks. Now we...
Londonistan, Islamic capital of Englanistan: With no new hits on the horizon and no obsessed new wife with crazy causes to lead him by the nose, aging Beatle Paul McCartney is back to re-hashing old issues. Yesterday he urged India to declare a nati...
After the calm, the storm. After the lovin' the fightin'. After the euphoria, the letdown. And so it is with the whole business of dreaded Christmas gifting followed by the equally awful and time-consuming Christmas Gift-returning. So it's no w...
Britain enters 2011 with the same-old left-overs of yore as long-simmering divisions threaten to split the Church of England. What are they fighting over? Weapons of mass destruction? Territorial disputes? Who can save mankind first? Hell no!...
Tired of cheating men and failed marriages Canadian country songbird Shania Twain and everybody's favorite TV sweetheart Valerie Bertinelli kicked off the New Year by marrying each other. The 5 bridesmaids consisted of a 900-pound Kirstie Alley who...
[INSIDE THE BIRTHING ROOM - BUCKINGHAM PALACE] Phew! That was almost the year that was. After the bad-hat fiasco would there be anything that could put a smile on the Royal Glums? Well thanks to the colonies - C-eh-N-eh-D-eh to be exact, QE2...
Did she really mean it when she said she was ending her show? Well in the entertainment biz one never says never. Guess what? Sheeee's baaaack!!!! Out with the old, in with the same old! D'Oprah Winfrey - title holder of the queen of Love Me Do self-promotion; pied piper of self-gratification; empress of whinge; Maharani of the me-me generation; seducer of dysfunctional addicts and hoarder...
It was intended to be the beginning of a new fashion trend. One that would both redeem the monarchy while extolling their frugality. But as such things are wont to do the entire Royal Recycling program has exploded in a fur-iously frantic free-for-...
Kelly Osbourne celebrated the festive season with a full frontal, foul-mouthed tirade on Twitter against her once great love and ex-fiance. The wannabe TV star and her model-fiance Luke Worrall split in July after she learned he had allegedly che...
Where would the world be without those dating sites that promise perfect matches? Just ask Hari Twolingas who so far has led a lonely life because of his unique affliction - he was born with 2 penises. "People in my village worshiped me as a god"...
Twas the mouse before Christmas and all through the night, spoof writers keyboards seized up in mid-type cos the men were all sozzled and totally half-baked while the ladies grew randy and threw out the cake So while I can still see and somewhat spell Merry Whatever to all and Bingle Jell - hic Sssssh....sharing a shecret repice sent by besht fren'- recshipe creator name unknown, thanks...
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