Miami, Florida - (Ultimate Last Supper Menu Mess): First Hellfiredamnation Church of the Res-erection convert Father Cutie-Pie has confided in his new-found flock about "several acts of hardcore communion" on the golden sands of West Palm Beach with...
Cross City, Dixie County - In an amazing development four Florida counties, Lafayette, Gilchrist, Levy and Dixie have issued a legal challenge to Florida's new bestiality laws. Citing an oft overlooked 1839 statute Major Jeremiah Blunkin of Cross...
(Orange County, Florida) Orlando police reported that they have arrested Mrs Bertha Fielding under the US Anti-Spam law in the early hours of the morning. Mrs Fielding's computer was confiscated along with her collection of gnomes. According to polic...
Unless you have experienced it yourself, the shock of finding your seed infested with weevils is unimaginable. So just think what it must be like to find that as a result of weevil infestation you are going to have to cancel one of the south-east's...
Unable to compete with numbers or firepower, Miami police this evening are staging a 100% pull out from central Miami. This move follows years of a slowly losing battle against drugs and crime, and is scheduled to be completed "before the sun comes u...
Aggressive sand mining techniques in central Florida have finally tipped the scale. Late yesterday afternoon, a sand mine in Keystone Heights was accidentally dug through the bottom of the state, allowing the Atlantic Ocean to rush in. By The star...
A whole new breed of physical fitness has been discovered near the southern tip of Florida, and it comes with four legs, and six legs, and sometimes no legs at all. Each morning the exercise routine begins with extricating large and sometimes poisonous snakes from the public showers, an exercise that is equal to a three hour cross country jog. But that's just the beginning, and your Florida fit...
Buffy Helms, a junior cheerleader at the University of Florida, resigned from her squad and spoke candidly with reporters on the eve of her schools participation in the BCS National Championship game. The young woman revealed sordid details of sexua...
The sun's rays began to beat down on Miami's South Beach around twelve noon today, awaking Chad Breeford from his still-drunken stupor gained from a Friday night of club hopping and tikki-bar desecrating. As family beach-goers jockeyed for th...
Miami, Florida (IPP) - Last Saturday's Florida Gator's win over the UM Hurricanes has been reversed by NCAA officials. NCAA president, Jimmy Johnson, told reporters that there were too many bad calls against Miami. Johnson also told reporters tha...
Off the coast of Florida, a gentle wind became a hurricane upon the slightest provocation by the north-western winds.
Now that the Democratic Party Primary Election season is almost over, Howard Dean and the Democratic National Committee (DNC) has settled the disenfranchisement fiasco of voters in Florida and Michigan, an almost unified Democratic Party is moving forward to the August 2008 convention in Denver Colorado. New Democratic Party bumper stickers have been seen around Washington DC.
Washington, DC - Outraged Republican Party officials denounced the compromise reached today by the Democratic Party Rules Committee, seating 50% of the delegates from Michigan and Florida even though those states had violated party rules.
Health experts in New York and Florida have discovered what makes people who move to Florida just as obnoxious as they were up in New York. One would think they would move down here and retire and have nothing to do but enjoy retirement and the nice...
Dangling an enormous ding-a-ling from the back end of your car or truck might soon be illegal if you live in Florida.
AP, SARASOTA -- Citing feelings of being disenfranchised, 78% of Floridian democrats are planning to move to North Carolina before the primary of the 'First in Flight' State, according to a recent AP poll.
Due to the controversy of the Democratic Primary in 2008, the State of Florida has announced that the 2000 Presidential Election will be redone in June.
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