Nick C Legg - My Fake Diary

Tuesday, 23 April 2013

Mr David has told me that I must stand in the corner for an hour as I did not say enough about him on the TV this morning. One I have finished standing in the corner I have to polish Mr David's shoes and as a punishment Mr David had invited the Mayor of London over for tea and buns. I not only have to make this but also polish Mr Boris' shoes which are normally in an appalling state.

I have been told that I am the favorite to win the Widmerpool prize. Mr David said this was probably right because I wore the wrong type of raincoat the first day I turned up wo be his fag.