Cliff Richard - My Fake Diary

Thursday, 5 December 2013

Well if there's one thing I can't stand its God Botherers at the door, so this morning I was ready for them. I screamed at them and set my pink pitbull on them.

Too late I realised it was Hank Marvyn and his Jehovah's Witness gang. "Hi Cliff, grinned Hank! I'm afraid your dog has severed my femural artery. Sorry Hank I grimaced, forgot you'd gone over to the dark side, you aren't allowed blood transfusions so what kind of coffin do you want?"

He saw the funny side of things and we had a glass of orange juice together just before he passed away.