Written by Jaggedone
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Wednesday, 31 October 2012

image for Nottingham man arrested at Nottingham Lidl for laughing out too loud!
Godd that he wasn't around to witness a real-life Robin Hood laughing in a German supermarket; Donnerwetter! und Blitzkri

Nottingham, UK: In a bizarre incident today an ageing gentleman was arrested at the German supermarket, Lidl, in Nottingham. It seems he was acting like a loony and could not contain himself whilst laughing his bald head off very loudly!

Other English customers found it quite amusing to see a laughing and smiling face at Lidl, because normally they are confronted with stone faces who have been taught to do it the German way.

Whilst waiting to pay for his veg and slightly rotting fruit, the man, who is not in posession of particularly good health, was laughing all the way to the till and this was too much for the Lidl personnel, so they phoned for the police to come and arrest this very strange gentleman.

A Lidl spokeswoman, Frau Helga Hess-Ler (no relation) gave the following statement to the local press:

"Ve do everything to please our British clients, ve do not smile, ve serve zem nearly rotten fruit and veg on ze cheap vizout labels; but zis Mein Herr is just too much, laughing out loud in a German supermarket, nein, bitte!"

The man, Gerry (appropriate) Hinchclock (named changed for legal reasons), was last seen desperately holding on to a strange book called EQ whilst being carried out of Lidl horizontally by 4 beefy policewomen kicking his legs and screaming: "I love Volga Olga and you bastards will never stop me!"

Lidl, have in ze meantime, promised zheir British clients zat zey vill not take zings quite so seriously in ze future and tell zem ze origins of zheir fruit and veg!" (Perfect translation)

Make Jaggedone's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 5 plus 1?

3 22 18 6

Go to top ^