Written by Jaggedone
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Friday, 2 September 2011

image for German dairy cow saw the abbatoir coming and did a runner!
Let's hope they all do a runner when they're time is up!

A Bavarian dairy cow named Heidi (name changed for legal purposes) run dry so the farmer decided to send it to the abbatoir, but Heidi being a clever old cow, smelt the abbatoir and bolted for it.

The German police, Fire Service and others did all they could to catch Heidi, but it seems she was a bit to nifty for them. After disappearing into the local woods she lived off of toadstools, fresh herbs, succulent grass and even made friends with the local Leprechauns, German version called the Smurfs (or are they Double Dutch?) who milked her.

Now after 3 months on the run she has given herself up to the local forestry authorities because living the life of a German "Robin Hood and her merry Smurfs" was too tiring.

The Bavarian RSPCA heard about Heidi's exploits and have now offered her a place in the local OAP cow's home so she wont have to endure the dramatic experience of being bolted through the head, strung up half alive and hung drawn and quartered.

It just goes to show that many Germans and Bavarians do have hearts and respect for their fellow beings and are gradually learning that life is more than a plate full of sausages, chops and joints of beef.

Heidi has promised to donate the rest of her milk to the local kindergarden and they gladly accepted, yummy! (what a happy end)

The author of this happy Spoof is a veggie and proud of it BTW!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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