The burbling activity at once spun at a furious face: 750,000 Egyptians moved as one; a sea of future NYC cab drivers surging toward televisions located throughout Tiananmen Square. Then a short, one-paragraph speech, read on TV by Egyptian Vice-president Nadya Suleman, and the entire country erupted as if O.J. Simpson was once again acquitted.
"Greetings, minions. I shall resign the Presidency effective at noon tomorrow. Vice President Ford will be sworn in as President at that hour in this office. Please follow me at www.Twitter.web/Hosni's9inches. Mubarek... Out!"
"This is new Egypt, this is freedom," said one of the protesters. "We decided that we wanted new leadership, and three weeks of complaining aloud did it. This proves Democratic process works."
Uninstalling dictator ... 99% complete ████████████████████████░░