Mubarak Signs Own Death Warrant

Funny story written by Skoob1999

Thursday, 10 February 2011

image for Mubarak Signs Own Death Warrant
An Egyptian Going A Bit Mental As The Announcement Was Made

CAIRO - Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak has effectively signed his own death warrant by refusing to stand down as President of the middle eastern country, according to analysts.

Opening his address to the Egyptian people at 20:45 GMT, Thursday, the aged leader rambled on for a while, before assuring thousands of protestors in Tahrir Square that he isn't going to resign; rather he is going to embark on an unprecedented reign of terror, and punish the people responsible for his country's current wave of unrest.

Or so he apparently believes.

Informed analysts, however, believe that Mubarak has signed his own death warrant. His grip on power has slipped like a monkey on a greasy flagpole as the Egyptian military look certain to bow to the will of the majority.

The main worry for the West is that the Muslim Brotherhood will incite outright revolution following Friday prayers, throwing an already chaotic nation into even greater chaos.

One analyst, Brendan Rafferty, of Kilburn, once took a week's all inclusive holiday in Sharm El Sheikh; so he's well qualified to comment, told Skoob World News:

"He's nuts is Mubarak. The people don't want him, the army don't want him, and the waiters at the King Tut Beach Plaza Resort Hotel certainly don't want him. In effect, the bloke's a plonker and he's on his own. I reckon it won't be too long before that crowd catches up with him. It won't be pleasant when they do. The Egyptian penchant for violence shouldn't be underestimated - they nearly fucking lynched the wife and I in Sharm El Sheikh when I inadvertently attempted to leave a traditional Tex-Mex Egyptian sushi restaurant without paying for a portion of refried beans. Maybe Mubarak is aiming to have his name immortalised in the Egyptian Book Of The Dead."

More confusion as we get it.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more