Written by Kid Icarus

Thursday, 10 February 2011

image for Mark Sanchez nearly wiped out by a predatory woman
Unmarried, Eliza Kruger, remembers the past.

EVOLUTIONARY DEAD END- Eliza Kruger an adult female comes close to destroying NFL hero, Mark Sanchez, by violating his privacy rights and exposing an affair.

Kruger cunningly talks online that she had sex with quarterback Mark Sanchez by seducing him into having an affair. Hundreds mock Sanchez for being senile and getting duped.

Eliza who had sex with several older, male judicial judges and who is hip in the nightclub scene says she is ready for another male prey.

She talks about the fact that Sanchez was kind enough to give her tickets to a Jets game and a 54-year-old, male, judicial judge bought her dinner at a fancy restaurant and treated her to a pleasurable night.

Onlookers are demanding that Sanchez castrate himself and leave the baby production to Anglo Europeans.

Sanchez apologized and said he was going to start a brand new race with specially selected humans from southern Europe and the Middle East. "I learned one valuable lesson from this and it is that people of different races should not mix because the species characteristics do not match and Tiger Woods can testify to that." said Sanchez.

Eliza claims that she took one down, but had several more to go and that she is not particular about race, but would from now on specialize in hunting down her own race to avoid the criticism.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
45 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more