The person claiming to be Osama Bin Laden is an imposter according to Mr. Sherbut al Lassi al Osama Bin Laden,who claims to be theoriginal Laden.
"This chap is an imposter,no doubt," says Mr. Lassi Laden, "I am descended from the original Arab Ladens who'd resided in the narrow lanes of Aliyama near the holy city. Our ancestor,the great OsamaOsama bin Tehkhana bin Laden was descended from the Royal Pharaos of Egypt."
The great Cheops of Pyramids fame was his uncle and the elegant Nefertiti was his aunt. But one of his numerous half brothers ,the wicked Akhnaten bin Talli who preceded the famous Akhnaten conspired to get him exiled to the north. Penniless and hungry, he walked barefoot for months together to reach where he settled down ultimately.
There he started his own business of selling sheep's skins to visiting foreigners which included Hercules and Achilles. He became famous and rich in no time..all as a result of his hard work and enterprise.
The business flourished as time went by and the twentieth century saw the Laden empire at its zenith. It was then the patriarch and head of the family went bad and started dealing contraband goods and narcotics. He had innumerous concubines and a huge army of illegitimate progeny.
"You mean to say that the one you are accusing of being an imposter is descended from one of them?" This reporter managed to put in when he stopped to breathe.
"Yes and a hundred times yes," he said vehemently," this chap is doing nothing except usurping our good work and trumpeting them as his own. It was I who had planned the strikes at the World trade center Towers and see, what this.. this imposter has done ! He has taken the credit and is basking in its glory.. may He take revenge upon him.."
He began to sob uncontrollably.
"So what," said this reporter,"You can always come on the media and prove your words. Expose him and take the credit due to you."
"Can't do,"he sobbed,"his agents have stolen all my notes and proofs..if only I could lay my hands upon him in his lair.."
(Excerpts from the interview of Mr. Lassi Laden. Readers are advised to read the full text on this reporter's site. Failing that, they could see his interview on the Mega TV News on 31st September at 8.30 PM).