Ashes to Ashes, Dust to Dust, Iceland is buried, RIP

Written by Jaggedone

Sunday, 18 April 2010

image for Ashes to Ashes, Dust to Dust, Iceland is buried, RIP
Iceland has been punished by an interventionalist God because he hates Bjork!

God, peering from his lofty heights in heaven wearing a gas mask to protect himself from the ashes and dust has justified his decision to put Iceland to sleep and remove it from the face of the earth.

God has several reasons why he took this dramatic decision and has issued the following statement on his website:

www.heavenlyinterventionsornot.god

Here his reasons:

1) Icelandic bankers are corrupt and have nothing to spend their corrupt money on apart from seal skins and walrus fat.

2) Iceland only produce crap footballers and beat Scotland all the time.

3) Iceland have too many volcanoes and disruptive forces and it's becoming a problem defending them against the Devil, SATAN.

4)Icelandic air space should be given back to the pinguins.

The worst sin of all and the main reason why God decided to intervene is:

6) Iceland committed the cardinal sin of releasing Bjork from the local Loony Bin and allowed her to spread her madness across the planet (she's actually Satan's daughter!).

Iceland is now buried under volcanic ash and dust and shall never re-appear apart from occasional spurting geysers left as a memorial that GOD is still amongst us, RIP!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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