In a completely coincidental, unfortunate turn of events, a missing British Indian boy has been found safe and well in India at an uncle's house (named locally as Jeera) watching slumdog millionaire and eating chicken tikka masala and a peshwari naan, whilst his sister suni has "been kidnapped at gunpoint"
The father denies that miscommunication has any part to play, but he said with crocodile tears in eyes he would "welcome the £100,000 ransom required to secure the safety of his daughter Suni," "NOT" he said through gritted teeth, "my son."
The uncle almost incoherent through sobbing uncontrollably at the kidnap of his niece did manage to say that Jeera's take away do now delivery free of charge within a donkey mile radius.
