Unicorns Forced To Lower Standards Due To Lack of Virgins

Funny story written by Throckmorton Turdblossom

Thursday, 14 January 2010

image for Unicorns Forced To Lower Standards Due To Lack of Virgins
They've got another chance!

Unicorns have admitted that they will be forced to lower their standards for the foreseeable future due to the lack of virgins available in our current culture. Unicorns, as a rule, have only come to virgin girls and only allowed themselves to be ridden by virgins.

Sidney Applebaum, with the law offices of Applebaum, Meyer, and Abrams, represents the Unicorns and offered the following statement and information:

"My clients felt that it was impossible and foolish for them to maintain their high standards in our current world with our current standards and morality. While they only associated with women who were not sexually active in the past, this will need to change in the future for them to maintain a relationship with mankind."

"Skanky broads and cheerleaders are still out, of course, but the girl who attends her weekly church services and doesn't dress or act slutty otherwise will now be available and considered for unicorn contact."

"While the unicorns also state that they will not generally consider girls with naked internet pictures, those wishing to forward these to my office can be given extra consideration by my staff."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more