Irish Catholic Priests have shocked the world by admitting, "we have never played with little kiddies willies!"
They even went as far as announcing that they were "straight", had female cleaning "bonking" partners and anybody who accuses them of being Paedo's will be sent to hell and Satan will have hot anal sex with them using his "fiery corkscrew gigantic tool!" OUCH!
The Pope and the Vatican are shocked at these goings-on and demand that their priests tell the f*****g truth and admit that they are all "Gay Paedophiles" otherwise they will be banned from the Catholic Church due to "acting abnormal"
Speaking from his balcony overlooking the very sacred St.Peters square Pope Benedict gave the following statement:
"Any Catholic Priest "acting straight" will be banned from the church, Priests must follow the sacred laws given to the Catholic church by GAY St.Peter, Paul, Judas and the rest, be Gay and most of all enjoy children."
The Irish Catholic Church is in uproar at these threats and could eventually cut all ties with Rome to form a new denomination called:
The world awaits with baited breath how the Pope will react to such disgusting news!
As for the Irish, the HAND OF GOD is with you all (not the French one by the way!).