During an attempted interview, Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad grabbed the microphone from Ann Curry and spoke for six hours before handing it back.
The first two hours he talked about the coming of the return of the twelfth Iman, (Do I hear an Iman?) and after getting warmed up, began insulting the United States going back to the Civil War!
He then stated he was for love and happiness and joy once he had killed or converted all Christians and Jews.
"We have no nuckular weapons", stated the Iranian President. "I tell you that right up front. But we will soon have nuclear weapons. You have nuclear weapons, why can't we?"
He then got out of his chair and illustrated his new movement to replace "The Wave" at sporting events.
"Now watch closely", stated Mahmoud, as he spun his head completely around. "There, isn't that more exciting than the wave? Or you can spin and wave at the same time."
"The days of only a few nations telling the world what to do is over. From now on, we all must be heard...except the dissidents back in Iran of course. They are from the devil."
He finished with a two-hour long prayer, did a little soft shoe number while pointing at Curry, who was fast asleep, and then stated that he would stop making nuclear weapons and merely purchase them from China.
"You inspectors can come home with me! BIG Finish! Da-Daaah!!"
