Interpol Links Realty Show Killer to Missing Amanda Knox/ More Sex Games?

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Sunday, 6 December 2009


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Amanda and Ryan on the Run: Let the Games Continue!

Local law enforcement officials acknowledged today an international manhunt was underway involving alleged wife killer Ryan Jenkins now linked to the disappearance of accused Sex Game thrill seeker Amanda Knox recently pardoned by Italy Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi.

Jenkins is accused of killing and partially mutilating his 28 year old swim suit model wife during an erotic Dental game gone horribly wrong. His wife was found in a suitcase deposited in a dumpster, with all her teeth and fingers gone missing.

Jenkins, the son of extremely wealthy Canadian parents, and former Reality Show Contestant, is alleged by newspaper accounts to have been financially aided in his escape to Canada by his parents.

So far authorities have verified that Jenkins used a high speed power boat, a gypsy cab, a rented Prius and a moped to make his way to Seattle, Washington where he is said to have linked up with Knox who was visiting her parents after 2 years in an Italian jail . Foxy Knoxy had just been pardoned by an immaculate intervention by Italy's sex addicted Prime Minister and Media Billionaire, Berlusconi, who appointed her to a cabinet position.

Italian investigators have traced Knox's emails and have verified an ongoing relationship with Jenkins for the last six months. Knox was allowed the use of a computer to continue her Sex Game Advice Column after the ACLU took up her case and won her conjugal visits and the return of her popular Blog.

Lead investigator Dominick Bologna said the bells really went off when they found a thread linking root canal surgery and intense sexual pleasure authored by Knox, and carried on enthusiastically by Jenkins. "This rendezvous has been a long time in the planning,"said Bologa," someone should have caught on to this alot sooner, but our Prime Minister must have been using his little head, instead of his big one!" Silvio's estranged wife agreed when contacted by the media, and said simply, "Too bad the bitch didn't kill him too!"

Authorities said the pair may be difficult to apprehend due to the amount of money available to Jenkins and the fluency of Knox who speaks English, Italian, Austrian and Canadian, according to White House spokesman Robert Gibbs.

Further complicating the issue is the popularity of the disappearing Sex Queen Killer who has a benign cherubic countenance, similar to Spoof Site Thrill Killer Chamone, belying her demonic, erotic, and ultimately deadly real persona. "She has a lot of fans out there,"said TV horror host Nancy Grace,"someone that F*****anything with pants can always find a hole to crawl into."

The White House denied reports that the pair had been seen on Martha's Vineyard during a recent wedding, and discounted an eye witness account that a couple had been seen copulating on the Chappaquiddick Bridge at High Tide.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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