North Korea Threatens '1,000 Fold Retaliation' To U.S. Meddling.

Funny story written by rfreed

Tuesday, 23 June 2009

image for North Korea Threatens '1,000 Fold Retaliation' To U.S. Meddling.
North Korea's Brilliant Human Atom Bombs That Can Walk To Their Target And Sacrifice Themselves For The Fatherland.

The North Korean military along with their sidekick Kim Il Jong threatened not just the United States but the entire western hemisphere with '1,000 fold retaliations' should we try to limit their nuclear development.

This, coming from any other nation would, have devastating meaning. From Iraq this would have meant a thousand X's roadside bombings. From al-Queda, 1,000 times suicide attacks. From Russia, 1,000 times nuclear threat. From China, 1,000 times more junk than they send us now. From Mexico, 1,000 X's more illegal immigrants. And from North Korea it means 1,000 times more BS and bluff than ever before.

A military threat from North Korea, a country where in the past decade there was so little concern was given the common folk that people were resorting to eating grass, would be interesting. US analysts believe that their '1,000 fold' capabilities could include such things as:

  • A giant slingshot capable of hurtling thousands of pebbles at overpassing jets
  • A really powerful fire hydrants that could shoot water spray as far as 200 feet at attacking war ships
  • Thousands of single shot rifles capable of shooting North Korean lead bullets at Imperialist enemies
  • Hot air balloons that will defend the Fatherland against Fascist American jets.
  • Thousands of naked Korean cheerleaders who will sing patriotic songs to precision dance movements distracting our soldiers while their troops sneak over the demilitarized zone.
  • Fake cardboard palaces to act as targets for planes attempting to bomb Kim Il Jong's homes.
  • Two real atom bombs that will be taken by motor boat to Alaska and Hawaii and then thrown really hard on the ground by loyal suicide soldiers.
  • Lots and lots of propaganda films that will broadcast by hackers onto web sites until they convince the world that North Korea is winning.
  • Satellite broadcast of screeching North Korean propaganda radio that will interrupt the beams of radio stations worldwide causing all nations in the free world to surrender unconditionally in hours just to make it stop.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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