Written by Unconfirmed Source

Thursday, 24 June 2004

image for Greenpeace is Al-Qaeda!
Terrorist Ship?

Unconfirmed sources report newly discovered information proves Osama Bin-Ladin is a card carrying member of Green Peace and that Green Peace is actually a radical off shoot of the world wide terrorist network Al Qaeda. Today at the United Nations the Secretary of State Collin Powell made public the stunning facts that link Greenpeace and Al-Qaeda.

The discovery of the Green Peace Al-Qaeda link was made by Department of Justice staffers when they began to compare operations mounted by the two groups. The savage attack on the USS Cole and the daring day light raid on a cargo ship carrying lumber illegally cut from the Amazon rainforest were just too similar. A link between these attacks had to exist.

"The terror raid on the cargo vessel bears all the hallmarks of an Al Qaeda attack." Explained Powell while comparing the lumber carrier and USS Cole attacks. "Except for the fact the Greenpeace vessel contained no bombs, was crewed by unarmed civilians and had no violent intent, the attacks were identical. The attack on the US Cole is an obvious extension of the Greenpeace's tactic of interfering with illegal waste dumping and unsanctioned whaling."

Secretary Powell called the similarities "spooky and troubling." He went on to explain that the administration believes that Greenpeace's continued actions against US nuclear waste installations and laboratories is proof that it is actively trying to develop weapons of mass destruction.

Secretary Powell also disclosed that the Bush administration is considering Greenpeace as an addition to the Axis of Evil. While Powell admitted the Axis of Evil was becoming overcrowded, with the recent additions of Spain and France, It was still important to add Greenpeace.

Administration offices said off the record that the US Military is planning raids against Al Qaeda and Greenpeace to search for more evidence of the linkage.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: al-Qaeda, Green

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