Written by queen mudder

Wednesday, 16 June 2004

(Lake Geneva, Switzerland; Wednesday 16 June) Reports just in state that the Swiss Navy earlier today sank a Colombian-registered tanker allegedly carrying 1000 tonnes of cocaine as it tried to enter Swiss territorial waters. The MV Septum was intercepted by coastal patrols after failing to respond to loudhailer requests urging it to allow armed inspectors to board.

A series of warning shots was fired which were ignored, according to naval reports. A decision was then made "at the highest level" to fire a torpedo at the Septum as it continued to proceed along its course. Within seconds, the direct hit caused massive damage to the ship's stern causing it to sink along with its illicit cargo and crew of one.

A spokesman for the Swiss Navy said: "The Swiss Navy defends its right to enforce a Just Say No To Drugs policy and will rigorously police its coastal territories if challenged."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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