"Anthrax" Proved to be Harmless Cocaine

Funny story written by Kirsty Walker

Monday, 14 January 2002

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A large package containing white powder which was found in an un-named London office building was yesterday found to be simple cocaine, and not the deadly anthrax that workers feared.

The package was discovered by mail room worker Dave Sargent on Thursday morning, and was said to be leaking a white powder. The authorities were called and the ground floor and basement of the 14 storey building were evacuated. After tests were carried out, the powder was identified as high quality cocaine with a street value of £100,000 and was returned to addressee, who cannot be named for embarrassing reasons.

Mr. Sargent commented, "I felt a bit of a fool when I found out it was just coke, but better safe than sorry."

The cocaine was allegedly bound for a senior executive assistant's leaving party. When questioned about the package by our reporters, he replied, "Look mate I haven't know where it was and anyhow if you rub the slates in the road and Oh look! A dog! Do you want a kebab?"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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