NATO HQ - (ReUterus & Ass Mess): Recently recovered NATO archves show that Pope Joseph Ratzinger's father was Jack "Blackjack" Bouvier, father of Jackie Bouvier Kennedy Onassis and Caroline Lee Bouvier Canfield Radziwill.
The documents were salvaged from classified material that the Pentagon demanded be destroyed in 1988 when George Herbert Bush succeeded Ronnie Raygun as US President.
Bush was leaned on heavily by the Vatican to obliterate any references linking the hiring of P2 Lodge thugs to assassinate John F Kennedy in 1963.
And Vatican hitmen were already the top string-pullers in the US Defense Department to ensure the continued gagging of Holocaust secrets linking the Bush family to Adolf Hitler.
But unbeknown to Bush Senior the NATO files that got torched on his insistence were worthless trash.
The battery of blood-tests, brith certificates, verified photographs and cinematic footage as well as detailed witness testimonies from Neuremberg war trials - all these were buried under a mountain of disinformation.
And now other Raztinger-related files have been appended showing the extent of this quirky family tree.
This identifies today's Pope as the blood-father of Russian President Vladimir Putain (sic), IRA thug Gerry Adams and the Bush Administration's very own Asian fall-guy Osama Bin Laden.
"This little set may just explain why Bill Clinton ordered jackie Kennedy Onassis's personal papers to be locked up for a hundred years following her death," NATO top brass said today.
"We believe the time may now be right to re-open the mysterious July 1999 plane crash death of John F Kennedy Junior.
"This is the end of the Bushes as we know it!"
