The entire town of Henley has been infested with huge pubic octopus. It all started when a handsome stranger arrived. All the women, married & single had to have a go on him.
The man, described as, 'irresistable' spread the disease like pate as did the women folks legs.
One towns woman told us.
"He stopped to ask me the time & the next thing I knew my panties had fell away and we were at it hammer & tongs in the car park. He was amazing. It truly is not my fault. My husband wont have it. Can you talk to him for me please".
Another woman took down her panties and pulled an octopus out for us. We managed to take a pic. The bright orange creature looked very surprised.
The handsome stranger has since disappeared. Leaving chaos in his wake. Mr Johnson told us: "My marriage is over & I am very itchy."
A clinic with an octopus specialist has been set up in the town in order to contain the spread. The specialist told us: "These cute looking creatures are really only after a home. I feel a bit bad having to evict them".
A campaigner against cruelty to pubic octopus said: "Its darn right horrific. Let them be. Apart from a wee bit of scratching they do no harm"
The whole of Henley has been cordoned off. We were checked thoroughly in our undercarriage before being sent away.
