British forces in Iraq have come under fire from Iraqi civilians after rumours that they had introduced ferocious, man-eating badgers onto the streets of Basra in the south of the country.
The creatures, it is claimed, have been released into the Basra suburbs to rid the area of insurgents and other troublesome unwashed individuals who spend their spare time killing soldiers.
The first sighting of one of the 'badgers' came two weeks ago near the airport. Local tramp Mushtaq al-Carlsberg said:
"It was very big, like an elephant. It had sharp teeth and whirly blades on top. It went up into the sky, and the noise and the wind were deafening!"
Another witness, housewife Suad Hassan, spied one yesterday and said:
"It was behind my house. I would say it was as big as my house, but with a long snout. Suddenly it let out a loud cry, and fire shot out from the snout. There was a loud explosion, and half a mile away my neighbour's house disintegrated!"
British Army High Command say they know nothing about the claims. UK Military spokesman Major Mike Ironhorse told reporters:
"They're always coming up with new stuff. Badgers? Whatever next!"
