Richard Perle Admits 9/11 Was Made Up

Funny story written by Cal Jennings

Saturday, 5 May 2007

image for Richard Perle Admits 9/11 Was Made Up
Former Assistant Defense Secretary Richard Perle Testifies

CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Washington, D.C. - Former Assistant Defense Secretary Richard Perle said that former CIA Director George Tenet is attempting to "shift responsibility" for his failure to anticipate the September 11, 2001, attacks and recognize the threat terrorists posed to the United States. Perle said that Tenet was secretly working for the Bush Administration when he made up the 9/11 story.

"The whole thing was a conspiracy," said Perle. "He simply makes up things I never said and places them on a date I wasn't even in the country. He has no more regard for the truth than President Bush."

In Tenet's book about the CIA, "At the Center of the Storm," he writes that the day after the 9/11 attacks, Perle told him, "Iraq has to pay the price for what happened. They bear responsibility."

"I never said that! He's just got it completely wrong," Perle said. "I never believed Saddam Hussein was responsible for 9/11, and by the time I returned to the U.S., it was pretty clear that it was [Osama] bin Laden. Indeed, bin Laden was claiming credit, not Saddam." Perle said that he fully understood that it was Afghanistan and not Iraq who attacked us. "9/11 was a hoax," added Perle.

Perle said that he was in France at the time of the attacks and did not see Tenet until a week later, yet Tenet claims to have talked to him.

"Either Tenet is a hard-core liar, or he's suffering from hallucinations. He needs to lay off the acid. You can't really blame him, though. Tenet got addicted to LSD when the CIA was performing mind control experiments," said Perle.

Perle added, "They made the decision, I think wrongly, that we send thousands of Americans to Iraq and try to administer that country." He then said "...it was politically inept and I think it contributed to the situation we're in today."

President Bush is considering naming him an enemy combatant and will not invite Perle to the Bush/Blair wedding. Tony Blair concurs.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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