There was mild panic in southeast Asia this morning when a man walking to work was the victim of an aerial attack from a snake which dropped out of a tree onto his bonce, scaring the shit out of him.
Although we are not able to effectively communicate with snakes, and cannot, therefore, be certain, and without doubt, about their intentions, the man in question was adamant it was an attack rather than an accident.
Moys Kenwood, 57, was walking along a tree-lined avenue near the school where he works, when, from up above, a rubbery thing suddenly landed atop his cranium, causing him to scream loudly.
Then the rubbery thing slithered away to carry on its day.
Eyewitnesses giggled at the foreigner. One said:
"Hello! Hello! Hello!"
"Look! A snake has fallen out of the tree onto that foreigners head!"
Kenwood was born and grew up in England, where snakes are only seen on television or in books, and are, therefore, that much more frightening when one lands on you.
This particular snake was not a dangerous one, but he wasn't to know that, and that's what he told his wife when he arrived home, and presented her with his dirty underpants to wash.