Moscow, Russia Head of Russia, Vladimir Putin, released what he says is an alibi for his whereabouts during the recent Malaysian plane crash in the Ukraine.
"I was at Sam's Club in Moscow buying some spare epaulets for my new military uniforms. I designed them myself. Everybody complains when I take my shirt off, now I will have some worthy shirts to wear. I have the receipts to prove it. I was nowhere near the Ukraine when that plane went down so I wish you paparazzi would leave me alone about that," Putin said through his new interpreter, Dennis Rodman.
"What is it with these Malaysian planes anyways? I had nothing to do with the other one disappearing also. Now I don't want to even hear the word plane anymore!" shouted Putin.
After saying his piece, Putin took his shirt off and left the building.