Boko Haram Leader Abubakar Shekau Steps Down After Latest Kidnapping Scandal - Thanks To #'s and Twitter

Funny story written by D P Whitehead

Thursday, 8 May 2014

image for Boko Haram Leader Abubakar Shekau Steps Down After Latest Kidnapping Scandal - Thanks To #'s and Twitter
Thanks To Brian From Texas, Who Posted A Stern Message On Facebook - Boko Haram Leader Gives Up

Succumbing to public outcry and intense media scrutiny over yet another kidnapping scandal, embattled Boko Haram leader Abubakar Shekau has promised to step down from his position as head of the terrorist group, amid all the outcry in Western social media, that he hasn't seen nor read; following the abduction of nearly 300 Nigerian schoolgirls.

His resignation is expected imminently.

"Abubakar has finally done the right thing," said Boko Haram spokesman Ali Kazim, "It is my sincere hope that Boko Haram can move forward, under a new regime of terror."

Meanwhile Shekau has announced:

"My fellow evil doers, terrorist and misguided fanatics, while I very much would like to continue to reign terror across Nigeria, I can no longer do so effectively while faced with this distracting and constant hounding by the Western media, in particular "tweets" and Facebook postings about me. In light of this, I believe it is in the best interests of terror that I step down as your leader."

Despite his resignation, due to millions of comments on news website's message boards, twitter and facebook - which Shekau never will see; the kidnaped girls remain missing.

"Maybe if the US or the West's military intervened, rather than celebrities and bloggers we might be forced to let them go, but, as the old saying goes; sticks and stones will hurt my bones, but words will never hurt me," mocked the terrorist, who doesn't even have an internet connection.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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