Sex Shown to Have Addictive Properties

Wednesday, 31 March 2010


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New York NY: A new study finds sex may be as addictive as the need for salt in the human diet. This scholarly study was published in the latest issue of Playhomme Magazine.

Male and female laboratory assistants were used as test cases to illustrate the addiction to sex. A group of randomly selected laboratory assistants were chosen from the work force of a large pharmaceutical company. Management said that this endeavor was a fringe benefit in lieu of any raises. Laboratory assistants are still cheaper than using rats.

The initial study showed that sex became addictive, the same way people become dependent on salt. The elevated frequency of sex triggered addiction specific responses in the brain, leading to continued wanton behavior after the experiment ceased. A bigger problem was the control group who only received salt and seemed highly agitated.

Researchers hope their findings will lead to the development of effective ways to reduce sex worldwide. Assuming the Obama administration provides additional grant money the study will be repeated using other groups, such as engineers and rocket scientists.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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