Washington, DC - President Obama confirmed rumors today he plans to rename the Great Lakes after people "more important that a bunch of dead Indian chiefs."
Reading a prepared statement from a teleprompter the President said, "It's time for a change, it's time for some updating. That's what I ran on, and that what I intend to do."
Republicans quickly condemned the idea as additional proof of the "moronic and confused actions of this administration". Democrats applauded the coming name changes as brave and forward looking.
A spokesperson for the Tea Party said they would reserve judgment for now.
"If it don't cost me nothing, and all the names are good white Christian names then we'll probably be all right with it," said Grand Dragon Elroy Wood. "If not there'll be hell to pay."
Obama said his tentative plans are to rename Lake Michigan as Lake Michael Jordan after his basketball hero. Lake Erie and Lake Ontario as Lake Malia and Lake Sasha respectively for his daughters.
Lake Huron will be renamed Lake Harvard after the university where he was the editor of the Harvard Law Review. As for Lake Superior Obama said that he would wait awhile before renaming it. "I was going to name that Lake Tiger, but Michelle said she would cut me off if I did. Sorry Tiger."