Denton Boy Runs When Texas Girl Shows Him Her Golden Triangle

Funny story written by Throckmorton Turdblossom

Tuesday, 29 September 2009

image for Denton Boy Runs When Texas Girl Shows Him Her Golden Triangle
Have you ever seen The Golden Triangle?

Tommy Staffless, a local Denton boy who went missing for two days and caused a statewide Amber alert, said that he ran away due to a little girl. Texas Department of Public Safety officers, Denton city police and county sheriff's departments, and volunteers from all over the area searched the city for two days and nights before Tommy was discovered hiding in a storm drain with his bike and a backpack full of food and a stuffed animal (Mr. Bonkers).

The child was only found when a city vehicle accidentally ran over the tricycle in the dark (which was partially sticking out of the storm drain). This prompted a rock throwing attack on the truck and a call to the police to report the incident. Officers who responded found Tommy (and Bonkers) and called his parents and Child Protective Services.

When asked why he ran away, young Mr. Staffless said "It was cuz of this little red headed girl that moved in next door."

The little girl in question is named Amber Brass and her father was recently transferred in from the Port Arthur area.

"Amber said that we should play doctor and she wanted to show me the golden triangle. I was scared because my mommy said that I wasn't supposed to look at a girl's peepee."

Dr. Justin Trace, a child psychologist from child protective services, explained to Tommy that the golden triangle is actually another name for the area that includes the Texas Gulf Coast cities of Port Arthhur, Beaumont, and Orange and has the name because of the money made from area oil refining.

When asked how she felt about the situation, Amber responded by saying that "Tommy sure didn't have a problem dropping his underpants and showing me his Panhandle. I also don't really understand is running away, because he said that he wouldn't mind giving it to me in the Red River Valley, the Permian Basin, or in the Big Bend....Texas really does have some interesting places!"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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