Pro-Midget Group Seeks TV Ban on "Midget"

Funny story written by Don Fulsom

Monday, 6 July 2009

image for Pro-Midget Group Seeks TV Ban on "Midget"

The Association for Banning the Use of "Midget" (A.B.U.M) has called on the F.C.C. to ban the use of the word "midget" on TV commercials featuring Joan Rivers.

"Every midget is dehumanized and minimized by society every time one of us tiny freaks of nature is referred to as a midget," declared a spokesman for the group. "We have almost the same sized brains as regular people, and we have starred in circuses around the world for centuries. Maybe our voices sound funny. But we don't look any funnier than the elderly plastic surgery victim that has chosen to belittle us as 'midgets,'"

"Be nice! Please call us 'vertically challenged' from now on, Joan Rivers, or we'll start boycotting your products-you old frozen-faced mummy," Thumbelina threatened.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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