Genetically-Altered Food Acting Strange

Written by Bureau

Thursday, 26 February 2009

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Broccoli Heads Seen Turning

Strange behavior of genetically engineered food products are beginning to be reported throughout the United State and are starting to worry consumers from Maine to California, and not just the food nuts.

Many incidents have been reported in the last six months. One asks if the country should continue in this direction.

In new Albany, Indiana, a stalk of corn followed a terrified young lady home from school for the fifth time and once appeared to be watching her house from across the street. The police were called in but the perp stalker disappeared into a nearby corn field.

A carrot dangled himself in the front of a mule, luring him away from the Henry family farm near Cub Run, Kentucky. The mule has never been seen since.

Another family in Idaho claim that their potatoes eyes seem to follow them around the room and grow larger when taken from the bag and placed near a paring knife in the kitchen.

The Norman Feebleblister family's cat, Schrodinger, suddenly arches his back every time they serve cabbage.

In El Paso, Texas, a bucket of Mexican jumping beans were spotted playing hop scotch just before daybreak on the street outside the Rodriguiz residence.

Finally, a man who had been in a vegetative condition for three months suddenly jumped out of bed when a visitor came in the room while eating an apple and did the Macarena for two hours before saying goodnight to John-Boy and once again becoming a vegetable, after being injected with a combination monkey glands and apple juice.

What will be the outcome? Who knows. But many people are becoming concerned and are demanding to know if their veggies have been modified.

What's in YOUR kitchen?

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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