Written by Daniel Williams

Saturday, 10 January 2009

In breaking news today, Gov. Rod Blagojevich was impeached by the state house by a 114-1 vote, prompting a press conference by the Governor. He stated that the he was not surprised by the outcome of the vote.

"It was a foregone conclusion in fact what the house did today they've been talking about doin for the last couple 'a years" the less than eloquent governor proclaimed. He went on to state that the impeachment was over his fight to provide cheap drugs for seniors and health care for those who can't afford it.

The Governor illustrated his point with the seeming obligatory anecdote about a constituent "O--- C--- is a young man who was on the All Kids program he was 17-18 years old and then it was discovered that he had rare uh kid uh liver disease- kidney disease... we intervened and acted in a way with legal advice around the legislature O--- C--- got that surgery he got his liver he's now alive and well...Is that an impeachable offense?"(the full name was not shown here to respect the privacy of an individual who has already suffered enough)

After giving his speech he opened the forum up for question. The first question was regarding the pay for play scandal, to which the governor responded "FIRE!" and left the stage in the middle of the panic. Initial reports have found no evidence of fire, but persons in the Fire Department with ties to the Governor say they are working on it.

Later in the day, An Attorney for the young man issued a statement: "naturally, my client is quite upset that the Governor is in trouble all because of him. He would like now to officially offer to have his kidney removed if that would help Gov. Blagejovich's case.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Rod Blagojevich

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